Celebrate the Small Stuff (aka It's ALL Big Stuff)

Anyone who works with (or has) children has heard the phrase, "Celebrate the small stuff!" or something to that effect. Until now I had wholeheartedly agreed. I now see the slight error of that notion. If we're celebrating the small stuff, we're still treating those "small" things as small things. But they're aren't, they are the big things that make everyday a monumental occasion worthy of celebration.

A few days ago one of my 3 yrd old students with Autism ran away from me while we were all in the bathroom. I called his name and he stopped where he was and waited for me to retrieve him.

To anyone reading this I'm sure this is a small thing worthy of no more than a "Good listening". Or perhaps even a reprimand for running away in first place.

However, this is a child who has myriad locks on every door in his house because he WILL and DOES run away from his acreage home. He has no compunction about bolting across a busy road or into a parking lot. He regularly attempts to escape from our classrooms. Never ONCE has he ever stopped just because his name has been called. When I told his mom what happened she was shocked and could hardly believe it. He stopped?!

Now, I ask you, was this a small thing?

The last day of school before the Holidays a 4 yrd old student with Autism put down his toy cars and asked me if he could paint some pictures.

Big whoop, you say?

This is a child who is terrified of anything messy or that can possibly be perceived as messy. Until that day, for 2 yrs this child has had to be cajoled, bribed or physically forced (sometimes all three) to participate in ANY craft for more than 30 sec. And while "participating" he screams, cries, flails and begs to be let free to play with his cars.

He PUT DOWN HIS CARS, walked over to me of his own free will and ASKED to paint more pictures!

Little thing or big thing?

Take another look at the children in your life. Are you overlooking some big things to celebrate?

Crazy Day!

What a day! Let's recap the highlights of day three of my "vacation".

1) Excited about getting a new washer/dryer tomorrow my loving hubby goes downstairs to disconnect the old ones

2) Few minutes later frantic yelling has me barreling down the stairs only to see a wall of water where my hubby should be

3) After using every towel, tea towel, dish rag and facecloth we own we've done the best we can to sop up the flood of hot water

4) The water to the whole house is now shut off because the pipe itself broke off, how does one fix this?

5) Frantic phone messages to my handy-man dad whose out in the woods chasing coyotes bring him home early

6) Yay for daddy! 3 hours later he's chopped off the pipe and soldered on a new tap! Woo hoo!

7) Realization the drywall is still soaked and must now be torn down and replaced. Joy. :(

8) Finally received confirmation that I've been underpaid for the past 4 months and the back pay will be added to my Jan cheque and I'll be making a few hundred more per month for the rest of the school year! Now we can afford all that drywall! ;)

Here's to a more relaxing rest of the "vacation". :D

How Dorky Am I?

So here I am on day two of my Christmas break. Yesterday I: slept in, hung pics, hung curtains, got groceries, went & saw my babies, made a bulletin board set for January, did laundry, made stir fry & watched some TV.

Now I'm bored! I am such a dork! What am I going to do with the rest of my two weeks?

Gah!

Hmmm...

Strange isn't it? To think about where we were when we were starting out our "grown-up" lives. Say right after high school or during university.

Even stranger to think how we thought our life would turn out back then.

Sitting on the couch this evening, looking at my gr 12 scrapbook. On the couch with me was my bff from way back then. On the floor playing were her two beautiful little ones.

There we were, remembering where we've been, what we wanted, what we thought we were going to get out of life.

I'm married and a teacher, she's getting divorced, has two great little boys, she's even gone back to school recently.

Neither one of us are anywhere near where we thought we would be. But that's okay. Some of it's better, some not so great. Just had me reflecting. We thought we had it all together, all figured out, all planned out.

Hmmmm...

Interesting, isn't it?

What's Your Name Again?

One of my students has a baby sister named Isabelle. She always comes along when he gets picked up/dropped off at school.
She, of course, was there this morning when the kids were getting picked up and we all said , "Hi Isabelle!"
One little guy who just loves her, says to his little friend, "Look, it's Isabelle!"
Well his little friend got VERY upset and started raising his voice and getting quite angry. He even hit him!
So I got down and asked him what was wrong, why was he upset.
"She's a baby! She's a baby!" He yelled.
"You're right, she is a baby. Her name is Isabelle."
"NO! She's not a bell! She's a BABY!"

He thought we were saying she is-a-bell.
Love it!

I'm With You, Man!

You all know how I feel about Christmas. AKA my obsession!! :)

Last weekend I set up my classroom for Christmas. Tree (which the kids decorated and it's AWESOME!), lights around my bulletin board, lit up Santa, I even made stockings for each child and staff member & hung them! Needless to say, my room rocks!

So the kids walked in on Monday and had varying reactions to my Christmas wonderland. Some didn't even notice, some were very upset I had a tree up cuz (according to them) it wasn't Christmas yet.

One of my fav little guys with autism has had the same reaction every day all week. I love it so much I now join him in his little daily ritual.

He comes in, takes his outerwear off, puts it away, walks over to my lit up bulletin board, grabs my hands and chants "Chrimas! Chrimas! Chrimas, Mrs. R! Chrimas! Chrimas!"

We now cling to each other's hands as we do a strange little dance/hop together chanting "Chrimas! Chrimas! I so cited! Chrimas!"

Pretty much the fav part of my day now.

Wish me well!

So my kids were sitting at snack with my EA's and I really had to go to the bathroom. I discretely (so I thought) told my EA I was sneaking off to the washroom quick. I was across the room when one of my fav little guys hollers to me,

"Have a good pee Mrs. R!"

I thought I was going to pee right there!

I love my job.

Decision

So I've made a decision. Not sure how well I'll manage to carry it out, but by the grace of God I'll be able to do it!

I've decided all those adults (that act like hormonal teenagers) can jump in a lake for all I care. THEY aren't my job. THEY aren't my problem even.

My job, my calling, my passion and my responsibility (on paper and off) are my kids. That's what I need to worry about. That's what I need to spend my emotional and physical energy on, all of it!

As long as I can honestly say that I am doing EVERYTHING in my capabilities to be the best teacher, model and nurturer to those little lambs God has placed in my care, then that's IT! Everyone else can just, well....I'm sure you get the point. ;)

THIS is who God made me to be!

THIS is what teaching is??

So is THIS what teaching is all about?

Getting criticized by anyone who has vocal chords and an opinion?

Being told almost every day what you're doing wrong (never anything that's right)?

People trashing the plans, schedules and programs you spent hours of time( you should have been eating, sleeping and seeing your loved ones) on?

I'm serious. I can take being bitten. I can take being sneezed on. I can take being peed on. I can take having my flesh ripped off by tiny little finger nails.

It's amazing how all that stuff can be fixed by a 4 yr old golden-haired angel leaping into my arms wanting a big squeeze. A 2 yr old running full speed into my room yelling my name.

I don't mind the physically taxing part of my job. I expected that.

What I do mind is the emotionally draining, spiritually testing interactions with the ADULTS!!!!

Do all teachers feel this way?

I KNOW this isn't what teaching is supposed to be about.

Stop or Go?

One of my little guys actually slapped another boy right across the face this afternoon.  I took him aside and told him, "Hitting is a stop!"

"No!" he replied as he pulled away.  "Hitting is go!"

Do You Have to Pee?

Little guy drawing on a magnadoodle today:

Mrs. R, look at my piss-ture!

You did what?

So funny!

Conversation between me and a little guy in my class this afternoon:

Boy: Mrs. R!

Me: Yes?

Boy: I hooked up!

Me: *blink*blink*  (I notice the play phone on the table in front of him)  Oooh!  You HUNG up?

Boy: Yeah!

Hee hee!

Motivations

It's often hard to really examine your motivations when Jesus shines his inescapable light on them.  It's comforting to know however that no matter how hard it is to face the sinful nature of our hearts at times, He never brings it to our attention to shame, condemn or blame.  Only to correct, strengthen and give us more and more of His endlesss grace.

So I challenge you to ask your Forever Friend what He wants you to face today.  It may surprise you, sadden you or even shock you.  But I promise, if you let Him, He'll grow you from it and you'll be glad you did!  So go ahead, hold His hand, take a deep breath, and look in His mirror.

Faster!

Most of my students have speech problems.  This often leads to amusing incidents.

We were singing Head & Shoulders yesterday.  One little boy, who doesn't like to do anything slowly, wanted us to go faster.  Now when he says "faster" it comes out quite differently.  

If you were walking by my room you would have heard a little voice shouting,

"Bastard, Mrs. R, bastard!"

Playing Together

Friday was such a gorgeous day all the Early Ed classes at my school decided to go on the playground at the end of the day.

One of my little guys with Autism (who does NOT play with other kids) brought me a basketball to play catch.  We were having lots of fun when I noticed a little guy with Autism from another class wanting to join in (he also does NOT play with other kids).

I asked my little one if we could all play together.  "NO!"

"Well let's try." I said and threw the ball to the other boy.  "Now throw to him."  I encouraged.  Next thing I knew the two of them were playing catch together all by themselves and smiling like crazy!!

I almost cried.

When I told my guy's mom he played catch with another child she was floored and so excited!

Despite the insane-ness, I love my job.

Makes it Worthwhile

I had one of those "it's all worthwhile now" moments at school today.
It was a pretty crazy day as it was the first time all the kids were in the classroom together. My afternoon class has 3 children with autism in it so it gets pretty busy and stressful at times. At the end of the day one child with autism got picked up by mom. She was the last to go so we were chatting with mom a bit. The little girl was very anxious to leave so mom asked her why she was in such a hurry to go.
"I miss my mommy daddy. But now I happy, I have back."
Wow! Myself and my EA nearly cried. If you know anything about autism you know what a profound moment this was!

Tales from Sunday School

So I'm playing a game with a few 4/5 yr old boys Sun morning when one looks up at me:
Boy: "Did you know my daddy is hot stuff?"
Me: "Is that what your mommy says?"
Boy: "Yeah, my daddy is hot stuff!"

We made sock puppets this weekend & I told them to decorate them however they wanted. One little girl was showing me hers when she was done. She had coloured the whole thing black & put red glitter-glue for 'lips'.
Me: Is your puppet a person or an animal?
Girl: She's a woman cuz she has lickstick!
Me: Oh.
Girl: She's just a hairy woman. That's why I coloured her all. I wanted her to be a hairy woman.

New Chapter

So we get possession of our new (but old) house today!!
I'm super excited, totally worried & pretty stressed out....normal for new home-buyers I'm told.
This may sound silly to some, but oh well...
I feel like this is the beginning of an exciting, crazy new chapter for Nato & me.
It's like our real, grown-up lives are starting now with the house, my first teaching contract, Nato's promotion a few months ago.
A LOT has been happening this summer, good stuff, but still a lot.
Even though we've been married 3 1/2 years now, and they've been busy, crazy, wonderful years...it still feels like NOW life is really starting.
So, here we go life, we're ready for you! (I hope!)

Sad?

So this afternoon Naestra started crying for absolutely no reason.  So we were all pretty much ignoring her but Alarielle pipes up:

"Don't cry Naestra because it will make Jesus sad!"

Whatever you say, baby!

Something's Fishy!

So my sis has a Jesus fish tatoo on her shoulder that's totally cool. She's had it for years now.
She was wearing a tank top the other day, sitting on the floor by Naestra.
N: Mommy, what's on your shoulder?
Krii: I don't know, what's on my shoulder?
N: I fink it's Marlin.
Krii: Marlin?
N: (Excited now) Yeah, it's Marlin on your shoulder!

So her tatoo is officially named Marlin. Love it!

God Talks

It still amazes me that God chooses to speak to us & in particular to me.  Seriously, who am I that the God of the galaxy speaks personally & directly to me?

Well, He answered that. 

 "You are a warrior princess.  Fiercesome & beautiful as I made you."

Wow.

I know that answer was not just for me, but for every little girl, every young woman, every lady of God.  That answer was for You too.

But was does His answer mean for us?  It means that we are not to be wilting wallflowers for God.  It means that in whatever way, in whatever place He has put us, we are to rise up & make war for God's kingdom, our kingdom.  We are NOT to accept the way things are or what the lies tell us about the way things "must be".  We have a responsibility to FIGHT!  To engage in purposeful prayer, to witness to those brought our way despite our fears, to delve into our Maker's word & to seek His face.

"Fiercesome" is not a light word.  Think about what that implies.  It means that the sight of us is to strike fear into the very hearts of our enemies!  That's huge when you consider how powerful our Enemy is in this fallen world.

God is saying that His presence & strength in us is to be so present, so viable that the Enemy is stricken at the sight of us!  That is a HUGE calling!

He must have a lot of faith in us to place such a massive calling on us.  The God of the universe has faith in, believes in, US.  You & me.  There are days I don't think my house plants should have much faith in me.  Yet the creator of the stars does.

He says, "I am glorious & righteous & fiercely in love with you."

That means YOU.

Huh?

So I had supper over at Krii & Brock's tonight with the kids.  Mid-way through the lasagna Naestra looks up & announces:

N: "Tavin's not a monster, he's just a baby!"

Confused pause on my part...

Me: "Well that's a relief cuz I'd be pretty concerned if he was a monster."

N: "Yeah, he's not a monster."

Your guess is as good as mine folks!

Interesting Thought

A friend posted a quote from a Christian book that got me thinking. It said that spiritual fervor in the wrong direction is better than spiritual apathy in the right direction. Interesting, but I don't think I agree.
While I do believe God honours & blesses our intentions TO A POINT, I have seen the "spiritual fervor in the wrong direction" of people who love Jesus do some REALLY terrible things. To them, to their loved ones, to people they just interact with! I have seen people who love God with their whole heart & are completely on fire for Him be deceived in what starts as small areas. These small things grew & grew until the consequences were nearly catastrophic.
Spiritual fervor is a gift from God & something we are called to, but can also be so dangerous.

Being on fire for God, but slightly off-target, is not always a bad thing though. If your heart's true desire is to follow & obey Jesus, & you just got a little off-track, I totally believe God can redeem that & bless you for your intentions & desire to honour Him.
However, the Enemy delights in taking well-meaning, God-fearing people & getting them off-track JUST ENOUGH to cause spiritual death & destruction to them & those around them.

Hmmm, seems like a fine line.
I don't know. I'm not saying I have any or all answers, I'm just sharing my musings on a topic I found interesting.

Happy Birthday!

Since I can't hang out with my hubby on his bday I'm home alone watching my fav sappy movie, P.S. I Love You.  It's the best cuz we ARE Holly & Gerry!!

So Happy Birthday to my amazing man!

It has been my honour to be your wife these past 3 1/2 years.

I love you babe!!!

I'm Done

Everyone who knows me knows I love an intelligent debate! (Sometimes I'm called down-right argumentative, hee hee!)
I have been happy to facilitate a discussion on the nature of God on my blog, however I feel now that what started as a discussion has turned into more of an attack or belittling of what I know to be true.
My blog was created to be a place for me to share things with the people in my life who love and respect me, Jay Jay, you are neither.
I'm asking Jay Jay to please leave my blog now. I hope you have learned something from my blog, but somehow I really doubt it.
I honestly and truly wish no ill towards you. You've made me angry, but not because you have different beliefs than I do. The manner in which you "presented" your beliefs is what angered me. I hope (and pray) that God blesses you with insight and wisdom in your life. I also pray for you salvation, if that upsets you, too bad. :)

Again, I want to reclaim my own blog. Please respect my wishes. Thanks.

And a BIG thanks to all my awesome ladies that left insightful comments. You are all truly blessed by God and loved by me!

Discipline

It sucks getting disciplined.  It always has and I'm pretty sure it always will.  HOWEVER...

that being said, I do appreciate more than I can say the results of discipline when it is given and accepted in love.

Today my Heavenly Father brought some things to my attention that I had been ignoring.  I didn't like how he did it, in fact I hated it.  It was awful and incredibly, incredibly hard to handle.

I did however, face what was being brought up, own it, and renounce it.  I accepted my Father's discipline for what it was, an act of the purest love I'll ever know.

It sucked at the time, no mistake about it, but now I can FREELY bask in the love, peace and joy my Jesus has bathed me in.

So I will choose to rejoice in not only my Father's pride and pleasure in me, but also His corrections, for they bring about a life lived abundantly!

My amazing girlies!

Okay, seriously, is it any wonder I adore them?

Perfection!

I normally love babysitting my nieces, but I must admit, getting to put them to bed is the best part of an already awesome time!
I love having them ask me to "Say prayers to the God" with them.
They hold my hand, and just gaze up at me while we say the Lord's Prayer together.
I can't get enough of their smile, their excitement and joy over talking to their Heavenly Father.
I hope to someday recapture that myself. Oh to have the faith of a child. Is it any wonder Jesus calls us to it?

Deatils

The incredibly awesome thing about the God I worship and adore is that He adores me right back.  I am His child and He is my Father.  That means He cares about every tiny detail in my life, cuz that's what a loving father does.

He cares if I got a flat tire on the way home, He cares if I have a cold, He cares if I hurt someone's feelings...He CARES.

Even more amazing than that, is the fact that He cares that much about every other person too, whether they recognize it or not.

My Future Bedroom when I'm a Millionaire...

Just When You Think You Know...

So just when you think you know what's what, God throws you a curveball!  :)

Fri morning I got a call that I was passed over for a job I had thought I was really going to get, so I spent the rest of the day in a funk.  I was depressed and grouchy and wanting to know why God had lead me to feel I was going to get this job just for me to be turned down.  And then, a few hours later, I got a call from the school that had turned me down.  They had a job for me, a different BETTER job!

So I now have a FULL time, special needs PRESCHOOl job for next year!!

The things God does, even when we're whiny!  I'm so glad He loves me much more than I often deserve! :)

Why Bother?

So after what I thought was the best interview I've ever done, and a call back for extra information (which I took to be a good sign), once again I got the cliche of job rejection lines...AGAIN!  It's the exact same line I have gotten after every teaching job I haven't gotten.  I believed it the first time, not so much any more.

"You were great/You did an awesome interview/You were our second choice BUT we're going with someone who's been teaching for ____ years."

Excuse me while I swear a blue streak for a moment .......

K, I'm done.

Just wondering, why do I even bother?

I really, honestly thought I had a real chance at this job.  I felt like God was telling me it was the one he had in mind for me.  Apparently I'm an idiot.

Ave Maria

There's a song I've been listening to recently, and it makes me want to weep every time.  It's called "Ave Maria" by Pink.  I know, you're thinking, Pink makes you want to cry?  Why, cuz she sucks?  Well just bear with me for a moment.

In it she, I think, sums up the cry of the human heart so well,

"Ave Maria, where did you go?  Where did you go?  How did you know to get out of a world gone mad?  Help me, Maker.  The chaos surrounds me, the devil that hounds me.  I need you to tell me, Child be still."

The end refrain is what really gets to me,

"If the darkest hour comes before the light, where is the light?  Where is the light?"

This is a woman who openly lumps all Christians in with the Conservative/Right Wing Movement, and she is VERY vocal about her disdain and disgust with them (not that we can blame her at times!).

So why does this woman, who refutes Christianity publicly, echo almost anything we could read in the Psalms?  -Where is the light?  Help me, Maker.  Chaos is everywhere, evil surrounds me.  I need you to tell me, Child be still.-

Sound familiar?

How can people still refuse to see we are ALL created with a void in our soul and heart that only the pure love of Jesus can fill?  What else could you call this song?  It is a lost heart's anguished keening for the love of a perfect Father.

I need you to tell me, Child be still.

What a Compliment!

So you all know how nervous I get about teaching anything above gr 6.  Well at one school I sub jr high and sr high quite a lot and I've always doubted my talents.

So today I had a gr 12 class for 2 blocks that I must say, I quite love!  I find them so funny and such genuinely great kids.

I got not one, but two awesome compliments from two different gr 12 students today.

One girl told me I was a "great teacher" completely out of the blue, and a boy told me he was "sad" I wasn't going to be subbing them next year (obviously since they're graduating).  I'm such a sap but I almost teared up both times!

Those are the first compliments I have ever had from sr high kids!

I don't suck! :)

New Home

So last week Nato and I bought a townhouse!! It's so exciting, and a little surreal!
It's in Stony Plain and we're so excited!
While we still need to take care of some logistics before it's OFFICIALLY ours, I can't wait!
We're gonna be doing some renos and touch ups, so be praying we don't cut off any appendages! Neither of us has ever done more than painting before! Yikes!

Exciting, Scary

So an exciting/scary new chapter in our life is beginning.  We're trying to buy our first place!!

I'm so pumped and yet scared stiff.  There is so much to worry about and so much to be totally excited about.

I feel kinda bipolar right now cuz I swing pretty dramatically between "We're gonna have our own house and make it awesome and love it and live in it forever and be so happy!"

to

"It's all gonna fall through and the house is going to fall down around our ears and we're gonna go bankrupt and be homeless in my parents' basement!"

I am my own one-woman show!

*sigh*

So another school year is drawing to a close and I am forced to think about the coming fall and new school year that approaches.  And it's very discouraging.

I have been subbing for over 1 year now, had a few temporary positions and a couple of interviews for permanent jobs, and...nothing.

I have absolutely no possibilities of having a full or even part time teaching job this fall.

I know God wants me to teach, but that can be interpreted so many ways!

Does he want me to be a full time teacher in a regular school?  Does he want me to teach as a sub?  Does he want me to teach in a ministry capacity only?

I've even been having crazy thoughts of trying to open a Christian preschool.  Is THAT what he wants me to do?

I really wish I knew or at least had some idea of which direction to head in.  I am grateful to have a decent amount of subbing to keep me working, but it's so frustrating at the same time.

I want to KNOW.  I want to feel like I belong somewhere.  I want to have my own group of kids to connect with and pour love into.

*sigh*

Fairy Tale

So my pastor asked me to speak in church this past Sunday about what God's been doing in my life in the last 6 months.  He made the "mistake" of telling me it could be in any format I chose!

So, I chose...a fairy tale!

He's what I read to the congregation:

Once upon a time there was a girl who loved fairy tales.  She loved to read them, to watch them, to dream them.  She loved them so much, in fact, that she collected them.  She would hunt for books of fairy tales from all around the world.  She loved that every country, every culture, and every era had that same desire for magic, for something special and wondrous.  

She had that desire in her too.  She even sometimes wished she could live in a fairy tale.  It wasn't that she had a bad life.  She felt very blessed most of the time, but inside she never felt quite good enough.  She smiled on the outside, while in her heart she so often felt like a failure, like an ugly duckling, but one that would NEVER turn into a swan.  It didn't matter how many people told her she was beautiful, inside and out, she still couldn't shake it, those awful doubts about her worth, that terrible feeling she didn't measure up, and never really would.  

She wanted to be like the princesses in those tales.  Even though they went through terrible trials, they always held onto the knowledge that they were special, that they were beautiful and worthy underneath the rags and ashes.  She wished that she could be a princess like that.  Brave, strong, intelligent ....and special.  Out of all the fairy tales she read, and she read hundreds, her favourite was The Beauty and the Beast.  

You've all heard the tale, I'm sure.  Of the beautiful young girl, who offers herself up as a replacement, a sacrifice to save her beloved father.  She willingly chooses to be the prisoner of a beast in a secluded castle.  For months she lives with the beast,  who is kind enough to her, and everyday he asks her to marry him.  Since she cannot see past his looks and other symptoms of the curse upon him, she always says “no”.  One day her homesickness becomes too much to bear and the beast allows her to visit home for one week, instructing her not to stay an hour later.

He knows full well she will not return, or if she does it will be too late.  For once she is away from him he will start to die.  He loves her so much, though, he is willing to suffer, willing to die to give Beauty her freedom.  To allow her the choice of returning to him, of loving him back.

So Beauty returns home, and immediately her family begins to implore her to stay.  They say she owes this beast nothing, no loyalty, no consideration.  Beauty almost gives in, but decides to return, a day late.  When she arrives at the castle she finds the beast, laying in the garden, seemingly dead.  Overcome with guilt and remorse, knowing she is to blame, she throws herself to the ground.  She cries out her sorrow, her regret for disobeying, and her newly realized love for him.

As you know, the beast awakens, but not as a beast any longer, but as a man.  A prince.  A prince who has loved her all along, who forgives her, and marries her.

They live happily ever after.

This was our heroine's favourite story for years, until one day, it became more than just a story to her.

She was home alone one evening, feeling a little down as she often did.  Feeling very much UNLIKE a beautiful, special princess.  She knew all the Sunday School answers about how God saw her, that He loved her, that she was His child, and so on.  Somehow, though, those answers she knew in her head, never quite took root in her heart.  How could she REALLY be sure how He saw her?  How could she know for certain how the God of the universe felt about her?  She stood in front of her mirror, unhappy with what she saw.  She heaved a great sigh, “Heavenly Father,” she asked, “What do YOU see?  Show me, please.”

A mist covered the mirror and a word appeared in it. BEAUTY.

She stared for a moment.  “Beauty?” she questioned, “You mean I'm beautiful?  That's so cliche.  I need something more, Father, please.”

The mist over the mirror cleared and she stood in the reflection once again, but different this time.   She looked the same, she wasn't taller, or thinner, or really different in any significant way.  She was wearing a magnificent gown though, with her hair piled up under a crown.  She WAS Beauty.  THE Beauty of her beloved fairy tale.

And her heart resonated with this message,

"You are my Beauty, and my princess.  That is how I see you for that is how I made you and who you truly are.  I am your Prince, your love.  Just like Beauty did not recognize who the Beast truly was, neither do you really see me.  You're not looking deeply enough to see my true majesty, my true goodness, and because of that you do not fully accept or trust my true love for you.  Look deeper.  Deeper into who you really are, into who I really am, and what that means.  You will see that every time you leave me, I too die for you again.  You will see that I died to give you that choice and freedom.  It doesn't matter what choice you make and I have known full well you would break my heart, yet still I died for you.  You will see that I will still be here waiting, no matter how long it takes you to return to me.  You are my Beauty.”

And he loved her, forever after.

My Dad's Is Bigger!

So I was teaching kindergarten today and overheard three little boys at the art table arguing.

"My dad's is bigger!"

"Well my dad's is longer!!"

Yes, I know what you're thinking.  That's what I was thinking too.  So of course I moved closer to hear better what the argument was really about.

Much to my relief I heard:

"My dad's trailer is as long as our truck!"

"My dad's trailer is as long as our house!"

Is it obvious this was a country school?

They continued:

"Well my dad has a dump truck!"

"Well my dad has a fire engine!"

While I know this would have been a good moment to interject a lesson about exaggerating and lying, I just couldn't do it...I was laughing too hard!!

I Can Draw Faces!

So here's my first real attempt at a portrait, and I'm pretty pleased!

It's only about half coloured at this point, hopefully it'll be even better when I'm done!

Kangamunk!

I stopped by to see my nieces and nephew yesterday before they left for a few days.  I arrived to Alarielle happily prancing around in the living room in a kangaroo costume so small the feet came to her knees, a baby "Roo" in her pouch, and massive Nicole Richie-esque sunglasses on.  She kept changing her mind about what she was, a chipmunk, or a kanagroo.

Adorable!

The God

So I had the incredible privilege of putting my nieces to bed tonight.  Naestra wanted me to "say prayers to the God" with her.  So cute!

So we recited the Lord's Prayer together, and I was nearly in tears.  It was so cute, sweet and beautiful to see her little smiling face staring up at me while she said the Lord's Prayer in her adorable little voice.  I could seriously barely handle the sweetness of the moment.

When I put Alarielle to bed she was feeling a little sad that Mommy wasn't there to "say prayers to the God" with her, so she was pretty tearful.  I was just stroking her head and talking to her while she hugged my arm.  I almost cried it was so sweet.

Especially when every few minutes, through her tears, she'd look up at me and and half smile and say "Auntie, I got you" while hugging my arm extra hard.

I don't know what I did to deserve them in my life, never mind their amazing love, but I'm so glad God gave them to us.

Fish Nightlights!

So Korean scientists say they've successfully cloned red-glowing beagle puppies.
You know what that means, don't you....FISH NIGHTLIGHTS!! Sshhh!

Chickamunks!

So my sis filled her old mp3 player with kid music for the girls today.

Cutest thing ever!

Naestra sitting on the couch, clutching the too-big earphones to her head, groovin' to the music!

Her favourite was the "Chickamunks!"

Inappropriate!

So I'm at the Dollar Store with my nieces the other day, picking stuff out for Lara's 5th birthday party. We were trying to get Lara to decide which goody bags she wanted when she spotted some with pics of those slutty Bratz dolls on them. She asked her mom if she could get those ones, to which Jess, of course, said no.
Lara looks at me and says, "Auntie Manda, those ladies are inappropriate!"
Love it!

I Officially Love My Cricut!

I rock!  I just hope my niece likes it half as much as I do!

Pay

So my niece has finally discovered dolls.  I thought it would never happen, but today she got her doll she named, Pay.  I think it's a cute name.  She's like a mini-Barbie with plastic clothes that clip on.

Alarielle is obsessed!  It was the cutest thing ever to watch her playing with Pay all day long.  She even snuggled into bed, put Pay on her pillow, covered her up, and "had a sleepover" with Pay!  Then her and Pay "got dressed for school" and "got purses on so we're ready to go".  Oh man, I wish I could have just followed her around with a video camera!  But my favourite moment of all came when we were putting our shoes on to take Pay to meet grandma.  Alarielle was holding Pay, spinning around saying, "Pay, you're my perfect doll!"

AWWW!

You think I look like WHO?

So I was subbing a rather, um, CHALLENGING gr 3/4 class the other day, but one funny thing did happen.

Back when I was blonde I used to get people telling me I looked like Britney Spears. Seriously, kids would stop me in public cuz they thought I might be her!

So one of the little girls in the class comes up to me and says, "When you walked in we thought you were undercover!"

"Undercover?  Doing what, honey?"

"Well, we thought you were Katy Perry trying to escape being famous and went undercover!"

Not sure if I should be insulted or what.  Any thoughts?

Art Class #1

So after my first class, here's the result.  It's a course on drawing with coloured pencils.

Here's the cardinal I drew/coloured.

Yes, I know it looks like a 5th grader drew it, but I'M still proud of myself, darn it!

Hmmm...

So I've been feeling odd lately.  Tired, sad, annoyed and frustrated by everything.  I don't know why.  Things are going well and everything.  But if you happen to read this, send up a quick prayer or happy thought for me.  I would appreciate it right now!

My Hubby Rocks!

I am so proud of Nathan!
Moxie's offered to make him a manager again, and as much as he wanted to just say 'yes' he held out to get what he deserved from them. He made excellent arguments, made them admit that he was invaluable to the company and is now a manager once again with a better schedule than we even praid for and the salary he wanted!
I am so proud of him for being so mature, intelligent and persistent!
My hubby rocks!

Mary Christmas?

So as the kids are filing out of the classroom this afternoon wishing me a Happy Spring Break, sweet little Tasha comes to me.

"Happy Spring Break, Mrs. Rintisch!"

"Happy Spring Break, sweetie!"

"The say Merry Christmas so people won't forget about Jesus' mom!"

-I had to stop and blink for a second-

"Oh, is that why?"

"Yup!  So people remember Jesus' mom, Mary!"

And away she skipped.

I freakin' love kids!!!

The Point

So I was subbing a gr 2/3 class the other day and out of the corner of my eye I notice a kid throw and pencil at another kid. I didn't say anything, wanting to see if they could handle it themselves.
The kid who got the pencil thrown at him goes, "Dude! You nearly hit me!"
The kid doing the throwing replies, "That's the point!"

Hee hee.

Your Tax Dollars at Work!

So, just when you think those tools in Ottawa can't get stupider! (yes, I said stupider!)

The bigwigs are in town right now touring the forensic labs trying to decide how to make some budget cuts.  Right now their plan is as follows:

-remove fiber analysis from trace evidence to save money

This plan means:

-if a crime (say a murder) occurs and the only convicting evidence is a fiber trail (eg. fibers from the bad guy's trunk on the body and fibers from the body in the bad guy's trunk) are the only evidence that can be found, IT WON'T BE PROCESSED OR EVEN LOOKED FOR!!!  This means, Mr. Murderer GETS OFF SCOTT FREE BECAUSE THE EVIDENCE WAS NEVER EVEN COLLECTED!!!

Yes, that's right my friends.  In a time when THOUSANDS of people apply for every forensic job (I'm not exaggerating here, everyone wants to be CSI) the government posts, they're going to close AN ENTIRE BRANCH OF FORENSICS!!  Why you ask?  To avoid paying those pesky little salaries of course!

As we all know, after all, money comes before public safety, justice and plain freakin' common sense!  Silly!

I strongly suggest you contact your MLA and MP to let them know what you think of this plan.

Rediscovering

So just this weekend I was inspired by someone to rediscover doing something I really love, drawing. I have always been creatively inclined (scrapbooking, making crafts, cardmaking) and I've expressed it in different ways throughout my life. I never exactly received any encouragement (my mom used to throw out the crafts I made her two seconds after I presented them to her) so I always figured I had no talent. But the desire to be creative has never gone away.
My mom is an awesome artist and painter and my sis can is also very talented so I used to try to draw, with very little success. It wasn't until I took a class in university on how to teach art that I actually learnt how to draw, etc. I LOVED it! Ask my hubby, I had my sketchbook out multiple times a day trying out all different kinds of things. I loved it so much I felt like I was visibly glowing when I worked (Nathan said I really was).
After my class ended I kept it up for a while, but got discouraged and busy. Now I've decided, who cares if I'm not very good? I'm not doing it for anyone but myself and my own joy. It's something that makes me happy, it's something I've always wanted to do, so I'm going to do it dammit!! Maybe I'll even take another class!

Creativity

So I spent an amazing day with two amazing women and their unbearably cute kids.  We chatted, made cards and had so much fun.

Thank you so much ladies!!  I enjoyed sponging off your supplies and way-better-than-mine ideas!

No Job Again

So I didn't get the gr 2 job I interviewed for.  I am grateful I got an interview, I really need more practice at those, and they did say I did a great interview.  But apparently I'm still not good enough.  They "went with someone with more experience".  Not sure if that's just one of those lines like "it's not you, it's me" or if I really only didn't get it because I don't have much experience.

I'm just so frustrated.  Seriously, how many times do I have to get turned down and torn down professionally?

Further Adventures in Stony Plain...

As previously mentioned, my mom is a waitress in Stony Plain.  The people here are generally, well, to quote Erie, "klassy with a capital k".

This morning a woman ordered breakfast with a side of sausages to take home to her dog.  Ok, fine.  Then she says, "What happens to all the sausage people order but don't eat?"

My mom:  "Well...it goes in the garbage."

Honest to goodness the woman answered: "Could you go through the garbage for me and pick it all out so I can take it home to my dog?"

As you can understand, my mom had no response.  Neither do I.

Why Now?

That's what I've been asking myself today, why today?  Why this week?   Why now?  Why at all, really.  Why at the end of a week that has left me exhausted, drained and weak in every way possible did God allow this to happen too?  Why did he take away the one good thing I had, and then let me be torn apart to my core?

I have an interview for a job I desperately want and had thought I would be great for in 14 hours. But after today I honestly can't think of a single reason why they should hire me.  I can't even say I believe I'm a great teacher, or even a very good one.  If they were to ask me the typical interview questions "Why should we hire you?", I wouldn't have an answer.  All I can think of or hear in my mind is that I'm a failure, I'm a mediocre teacher at best, etc. etc.  

Why?  That's all I want to know.  God, why?  The person who tore my heart out today, why?  Why?

Definitely Top 5!

My husband couldn't be any better, sweeter or thoughtful.  Despite being exhausted, having to get up early for work, and coming down with a cold himself, he still stayed up half the night with me.  To take care of me.  I was gut-wrenchingly sick (literally!).  He could barely keep his own eyes open yet he made sure I had a barfie (thanks Christy!), water, soothing music and everything else I needed.  He even stayed up just to talk to me and distract me from how lousy I felt.

When I weakly told him he was the best husband in the world, he responded, "Well, top 5 maybe!"

Definitely babe, definitely top 5! ;)

Oh, Stony Plain!

Just in case you don't believe that Stony Plain is the poster child for rednecks, here's the final proof!

My mom works in a small restaurant/cafe in Stony frequented by what we not-so-lovingly refer to as the "Stony old people".

She has REGULAR customers (who come in a few times a week) and order either half a cup or coffee or a 1/3 cup of coffee.  They then expect to only pay HALF or 1/3 the price of a regular cup of coffee which is already LESS than a dollar!  A few of them even ask her to "top up" their half cup of coffee with hot water!

Isn't Stony Plain classy?

How the Princess got its Prince

(*here's another one, I couldn't resist!*)

Once upon a time there was a princess in her castle. Her name was Samantha. She was very lonely and worried that she may never get a prince. One day she told her dad that she can't wait anymore. But she was in luck, the prince was coming today! So the prince arrived then the prince and princess talked about getting maybe getting married. The next day their dads planned the wedding so they started to do the decorations. When they were done the made the invitations to the wedding. When everyone arrived the wedding started. And that's how the princess got its prince.

How the Star got its Points!

Once upon a time there was a star who was square shaped. A crocodile bit him all over because he thought the star looked delicious. The star tried to swim away from the mean, bad crocodile. That is how the star got its points.

*This was written by one of my gr 2 kids. Couldn't you just die?*

Saying Goodbye...

So I'm saying goodbye to my grade 2's on Wed.  The regular teacher got her dr's ok and is coming back to work soon.  How awful do I feel for wishing a lovely person was too sick to work?  (I'm a terrible person!)

As I read her email telling me when she's coming back, my heart sank lower with every line.  In fact, as lame as it may sound, I'm fighting back tears right now at the thought of leaving my kids.  I felt so at home there.  It makes it a lot easier to know what an amazing teacher and kind woman their regular teacher is, so I have no concerns about whether or not they'll be "alright".  But I'm still heartbroken.

The past few weeks have been downright heavenly.  I've felt a sense of purpose and accomplishment I hadn't had for a long, long time.  I felt like I was part of a community, and a wonderful one at that.  I'm going to miss that so much.

I've been avoiding thinking about when my time there would end.  Kind of fooling myself into thinking I'd stay until Spring Break.  But now the end is not only real, it's soon.

*sniff*

Chasing...

So how much do I love my students?
Well, in art we were doing Northern pictures (igloos and what not) and Tasha made a picture of a fish being chased by a penguin being chased by a seal being chased by a polar bear being chased by a person with a pitchfork. To die for!!

Last spring I did a children's camp in the UAE (middle east).  It was a mixed age group from preschool to grade 5 which was challenging.  Here the kids are in my suite (yup, I got a suite!) doing Smartie graphing.  No one minds doing math when it involves eating chocolate!

My amazing hubby and I at a friend's wedding in January.

Not only is he totally hot, but he's also sweet, romantic, funny and totally nuts for me!

Ah, Humility...

Kids are so cute.
Today was 100th day at school so pretty much all day everyting we did had to do with the number 100.
I asked the kids to try to find 100 things in the classroom with red on them. One little guy did it WAY before anyone else.
He brought up his list to me and I exclaimed, "You did it! You rock!'
He looked at me quizzickly and said, "I do?"

Love it!

Teaching At Last!

So I finally have a "real" teaching job teaching grade 2 for a few weeks. It's a really nice class with only 17 kids! I didn't know schools had small classes anymore!
It's so much fun teaching grade 2, they're still small enough to be really cute but old enough to understand a lot and have good conversations with.
It's really sweet how worried they are about their sick teacher that I'm filling in for.

Why I Love Preschool!

So I was doing Preschool AWANA on Friday.  A little girl was complaining about getting called "Hannah Banana" so I was trying to comfort her.  I told her that when I was a little girl people called me "Manda Panda" and I hated it so much.  I didn't realize anyone else was listening to our little conversation.

Apparently one of the little guys in the group heard this, because he inexplicably called me "Mrs. Kung Fu Panda" all night.

I love preschool!

Bill Boy Goes to Hell

Yes, interesting title I know. Last week I honestly had the most disturbing thing happen while teaching yet.
I was in a grade 3 class with a very difficult little guy with a nasty temper. While battling with him all day was draining it was nothing terribly out of the ordinary. Until he gave me a 'comic book' he wrote/drew to read at recess. Yes, it was call "Bill Boy goes to hell" (well, he spelt it 'hall'). So in this comic Bill Boy, a little boy, murders another kid so that he can go to hell when he dies. Then Bill Boy dies and on his way to hell he stops in heaven and shoots God, cuts off His head and puts it on a sword. He takes it down to hell and gives it to the devil who then rewards him with a girlfriend.
Ummm...can we say serial killer in 5 years?
So yes, I told the vice-p and turned it over to her. Not sure if anything got done about it, but I hope and pray so.
I honestly hope I NEVER top this story.
Why did I become a teacher again?